The Story
The 100 Moms Project was born from a heartfelt conversation between Jill, a Boudoir Photographer and Relationship Coach and Courtney, an Esthetician at Natura Skin Boutique. As they caught up over coffee, they reflected on a shared truth—too many moms pour endlessly into others while neglecting themselves.
As mothers who work in the self love space, Jill and Courtney, know firsthand that self-care isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity. So many moms put themselves last, whether by default or circumstance, without understanding the compounded weight of responsibility, the power of self-investment and the belonging and community it can bring as a byproduct . A mom who feels supported, cared for, and empowered shows up differently in her life. She cultivates a growth mindset, radiates confidence, and elevates those around her. That realization sparked a bigger vision—to create something tangible for the women of Western New York.
The 100 Moms Project is the first step toward that mission. This initiative will help fund To the Roots, a nonprofit dedicated to providing self-care services and luxury experiences to moms who need them most. Because when moms thrive, families and communities do too. Join us in making self-love accessible to every mom.
Why This Project Matters
When we support the mother's in our community, we aren't just supporting her, but every person that woman touches. Her children, her partner, her friends, and coworkers.
When she is supported everyone in her life feels the impact.
Photography in itself is a time stamp. It gives us the ability to mark a moment that you may look back upon with wonder, excitement, and transformation.
This project to photograph 100 women is to give them that experience of being seen for who they are right now- not who they used to be or who they will become but for all that they are right now!
The mission of this project is twofold, give moms a change to give back to themselves with self care and connection while also support future moms do the same for themselves.
And the bonus we also are support our own woman owned business here in Western New York.
When mothers are supported, they are
more likely to be engaged in their communities, volunteer, and contribute to local economies
(UNICEF)
Moms who prioritize self-care
experience 40% lower rates of anxiety and depression, leading to better overall health (National Institute of Mental Health)
Kids with moms who practice self-care are
more emotionally secure and resilient
because they model self-worth and emotional regulation (Harvard Center on the Developing Child)
Pick Your Date & Location
May 3rd
Saira Studios
Step inside a working artist studio located at the Niagara Food Terminal. Saira will dazzle you up with fairy hair right before you jump in front of our lens.
A portion of the the fee will be used to fund our newest project, To The Roots, whose mission is to provide self care services to mom's across the Western New York area!
Location: Saira Studios
Time: 2:00-4:00
Cost: $150
May 4th
Golden Days Studio
Enjoy a 45 minute meditation inside the beautiful Golden Days Space followed by a 15 minute photo session with Jill from Bare By Barrile.
A portion of the the fee will be used to fund our newest project, To The Roots, whose mission is to provide self care services to mom's across the Western New York area!
Location: Golden Days Studio
Time: 10:00-1:00
Cost: $150
May 5th
April Spencer Floral Design
April has arranged a beautiful floral design set for us to create the most unique images. Each photo session will take place every 15 minutes with Jill from Bare By Barrile. Each mom will also receive a small bouquet to take home with them to remember this special occasion.
A portion of the the fee will be used to fund our newest project, To The Roots, whose mission is to provide self care services to mom's across the Western New York area!
Address: April Spencer Floral Design
Time: 10:00-1:00
Cost: $150
May 25th
Soul Healing Center
Enjoy a 15 minute Reiki Session with Lana at Soul Healing Center followed by a 15 minute photo session with Jill from Bare By Barrile.
A portion of the fee will be used to fund our newest project, To The Roots, whose mission is to provide self care services to mom's across the western New York area!
Location: Soul Healing Center
Time: 10:00-1:00
Cost: $150
May 26th
Bare By Barrile Studio
15 minute photo session with Jill from Bare By Barrile right inside her Larkinville studio! Here, you will be able to Bare it all during your portraits session!
A portion of the the fee will be used to fund our newest project, To The Roots, whose mission is to provide self care services to mom's across the Western New York area!
Loaction: 567 Exchnage Street, Buffalo NY 14210
Time: 10:00-1:00
Cost: $150
May 31st
the Bodhi Tree Holistic Spa
Enjoy a 15 minute massage to relax and rejuvenate, followed by a 15 minute photo session with Jill from Bare By Barrile.
A portion of the the fee will be used to fund our newest project, To The Roots, whose mission is to provide self care services to mom's across the Western New York area!
Address: The Bodhi Tree Holistic Spa
Time: 10:00-12:00
Cost: $150
The Best Sex Doesn’t End At O
Why Aftercare is the Secret to Deeper Intimacy?
Intimacy & Relationship Coaching in Buffalo, NY
You’ve built the anticipation for days, exchanging those playful, biting texts that put goosebumps on your skin and a thrum in your chest. The moment the scene begins, your nervous system is on a delicious, conscious climb: your breath shortens, your blood pulses, and you surrender fully to the touch, the heat, and the ultimate power exchange. You hit that primal edge, the release is profound, and with a full-body sigh, you feel… everything.
But the moment the play ends, the silent question surfaces: What now?
For many, this transition from extreme arousal and vulnerability—the kind that leaves your hair a mess and your heart racing—to stillness is jarring. You may feel a sudden emotional turbulence, a sense of "aloneness" in the room, or an intense, unexpected sadness. In the BDSM community, this is called Sub-Drop.
This physiological crash is why we prioritize aftercare. It isn’t just a "nice to have"—it’s the essential, negotiated practice that dictates how safely, deeply, and securely you integrate the intensity of the experience.
What Is Aftercare? (And Why It’s Sexy)
Aftercare is the intentional time, space, and attention dedicated to bringing the nervous system back to a state of equilibrium. Think of it as the "landing strip" for your high-flying intensity.
This includes:
Intense sexual encounters: Moving from the peak of pleasure back to the safety of the sheets.
Power exchange (Kink/BDSM): Re-establishing your connection as equals after the roles are set aside.
Deep emotional breakthroughs: When the "good" tears come and you need a place for them to land.
Boudoir sessions: Feeling seen and exposed, then needing to be tucked back in.
Intimacy, especially when it's raw and uninhibited, floods your system with a cocktail of hormones—oxytocin, dopamine, adrenaline. It pushes you into a profound sympathetic (fight-or-flight) activation. Without a structured, compassionate return path, the nervous system can feel "dumped."
Aftercare is your co-created map to land safely, moving from activation back into a state of "safe and connected."
Why Aftercare Is Physiologically Essential (The Sub-Drop Explained)
Intimacy creates a physiological high where walls are intentionally dropped. When the scene concludes, your body undergoes a rapid hormonal shift: the rush subsides, often leaving an excess of stress hormones like cortisol circulating.
This abrupt drop is the biological root of Sub-Drop. It can leave you feeling exposed, anxious, or even regretful—even after the best sex of your life.
This is not a sign that you did something wrong. It is a sign that your body requires conscious integration. Aftercare is more than just a quick cuddle; it is a safety protocol that helps the body feel:
Regulated: Calming the "fire" in your veins.
Held: Creating a literal sense of containment.
Connected: Rebuilding emotional proximity after the "play" is over.
Why We Are Conditioned to Skip It (And Why We Shouldn't)
Most of us were taught how to perform or how to pursue, but almost no one was taught how to care for ourselves after being vulnerable.
Our culture operates on a myth: “If the sex was good, the aftermath should be easy.” But the truth is, the deeper you go, the more grounding you need. When we don't normalize aftercare, we resort to old patterns like emotional withdrawal, "ghosting" the conversation, or an awkward desire to bolt for the door.
True intimacy isn’t just about how you handle the heat; it’s about how you handle the cool-down.
How to Negotiate Aftercare (Before Things Get Steamy)
In intentional dynamics, aftercare isn't requested after the fact—it is pre-negotiated. You must move beyond guessing and assume nothing. Start by asking yourself: “What does my body need to feel safe after I’ve been blown wide open?”
Communicate your requirements as part of your "play" agreement:
The Weighted Touch: “I need 10 minutes of heavy, non-sexual pressure to feel grounded. Just lay your body over mine for a while.”
The Verbal Reassurance: “I need you to tell me you enjoyed my surrender and that we are okay. A little whisper in my ear goes a long way.”
The Grounding Ritual: “I need a glass of water and a snack before we talk. My brain needs a minute to come back to earth.”
Somatic Aftercare: What Integration Looks Like
The practice of aftercare should be supportive, intuitive, and personal. It is the bridge back to reality.
Grounding & Physical Examples:
Skin-to-Skin: Simple, quiet contact to regulate heart rates.
Replenishment: Hydration and electrolytes (intensity is a workout, after all).
The After-Glow Wash: A shared shower or bath to transition out of the "scene" energy.
Quiet Presence: Simple eye contact and breathing together.
Emotional & Processing Examples:
Affirmations: Sharing what you loved about the encounter.
The Debrief: "How did that feel for you? Did we hit the right spots?"
Laughter: Letting the tension break with a bit of humor and lightness.
From Performance to Presence
Learning to communicate your aftercare needs initiates a powerful shift in your relationships:
From Performance → to Presence
From Disconnection → to Embodiment
From Guessing → to Deeply Known
Ready to Deepen Your Intimacy?
If you’re tired of the "awkward silence" after sex, or if you want to learn how to push your boundaries safely while building a trust that feels unbreakable, let’s talk.
Inside my 1:1 intimacy and relationship coaching in Buffalo, NY, we explore:
How to ask for what you actually want (without the blush).
Understanding your body's unique response to vulnerability and "The Drop."
The language of conscious, consensual, and high-heat dynamics.
Let’s move past the surface level and into something profound.
[Book Your Sex & Intimacy Coaching Call Here] Let’s see how deep we can really go.
Final Thought
Aftercare is not a bonus or an "extra." It is the essential final act of consent. Because how you are held after the intensity matters just as much as what happens during it.
Our Studio Location
